The #pysched2parent family is strong!
I love the #psyched2parent community and the fact that I’ve been able to connect with so many amazing parents online. This week, we hit 200 followers on the #psyched2parent Facebook page and have over 2,000 followers on Instagram. Not a member yet? Connect with the team on Facebook and Instagram!
Parenting in Action
As a mom and school psychologist, I love, love, love being able to share research and parenting advice with all of you and how to put it in action. However, I want you to know that I am NOT a perfect mom. 🤦♀️
Last week, my daughter (19 months old) came into our room in the morning and knocked my iPad off of the nightstand in our bedroom. It was an accident and not done on purpose. Everyone knows that accidents happen, right? 🤷♀️
Later on, as I was packing for my business trip, I checked my iPad and noticed that the screen had been cracked. 📱We aren’t talking about a small crack. We talking about the whole screen. It was completely unusable.
To say I was mad is an understatement. I was furious… I was upset with myself, I was upset with my daughter, I was upset with the situation.
But you know what I did? I took a timeout. I removed myself from my children and took a moment to pause. It may sound silly that I put myself in timeout. But do you know what happened?
I calmed down. 💆♀️
I used the same strategies that I have been teaching my son so that he learns how to calm himself down.
What steps did I follow?
First, I physically separated myself from my family. I asked my husband to watch the kids while I went to our bedroom to distance myself. This was helpful because I didn’t say or do anything, like yell at my kids, throw a sippy cup, or kick a toy. I mean, what did the sippy cup have to do with anything, right?
Second, I practiced deep breathing. I sat down on our bed and took several deep breaths. I wanted to slow my heart rate and stop the racing thoughts in my head.
Once I felt calm, I was able to put everything into perspective. I asked myself the questions, what does a cracked iPad screen mean in the long-term? Is this something that I can fix? Reflecting on these two questions, I knew that I could fix the iPad (thank goodness for AppleCare), and my relationship with my daughter was more important.
After I was completely calm, I took myself out of time out and rejoined my family in the kitchen. I was calm, had a solution to fix my cracked iPad, and went on with the rest of my day with a positive attitude. Putting these parenting practices in action was not easy but I did it.
Why does this matter?
I have no regrets from my interactions with my children that morning. I don’t regret raising my voice or losing my temper. After my timeout, I was able to stay calm. There was no raising my voice, throwing of toys 🧸, or doling out a punishment that I would regret.
This happened almost a week ago and I have ZERO guilt with what happened. Can I tell you how amazing this feels? It’s AWESOME!
Here’s the take away:
We can control our emotions and how we interact with others, especially our loved ones. In the short-term, it isn’t easy (trust me, I know!), but it pays off.
Not sure how to control your feelings when you want to pull your hair out? I would be more than happy to help! Let’s connect and come up with a solution that works for you!
